Questions

My personal behavioral and leadership style is often driven by questions. I’m a refiner; someone who needs to analyze the details, challenge assumptions, and search for multiple meanings and options. My desire to fine tune and improve processes and projects is the engine that drives many of the questions I pose in my work settings. I’m sure that I share this pattern of behavior with others. Even Garrison Keillor’s imaginary private eye, Guy Noir, is always trying to “find the answers to life’s persistent questions”.

Persons in leadership roles know the power of questions. They can reveal meaning behind behaviors, uncover secrets, unmask emotions and feelings, or challenge the status quo. Perhaps the most daunting challenge a leader faces is trying to figure out if they are asking the right questions. Let me explain.

Many organizational leaders ask: “How can we reduce staff turnover?” The answers to this question generally offer little that will dramatically change the statistics. It’s not surprising that employees become cynical and resign themselves to believing that little can be done to fix the problem.

What would happen if those same leaders attempted to pose a better question (perhaps even the right question)? Imagine asking: “How could we create a work environment that recognizes the souls of our employees, nurtures their creativity, empowers them to act, and offers them dignity and respect?” Would the answers to this question result in more of the same stale programs and behaviors? I doubt it. Might staff turnover be dramatically reduced if this question was fully vetted and the answers addressed by senior management?

If leaders are going to be successful at transforming their organizations the place to begin is by asking better questions. Rather then focus on what’s wrong or needs fixed, leaders need to ask about what is going well, what is possible, what is the right thing to do? Asking these questions will require courage since the answers may surprise and challenge you. Employees are waiting for leaders to ask them about the things that matter and to offer a forum where their answers will be received with respect and acted on with integrity.

The right questions have the power to change our frame of reference, to refocus our energy, to imagine new possibilities. What might those questions be in your organization? Will you be courageous enough to ask them?

Fun and Flying

Eight days ago I experienced what many airline passengers have come to expect when “flying the friendly skies” – a not so pleasant experience. Well, actually there was some fun on the trip so let me briefly explain.

Having spent the weekend in western Pennsylvania visiting my son I was due to fly home on Sunday afternoon. Unfortunately a series of major thunderstorms rolling through southeastern Pennsylvania created havoc with my flight schedule (and those of many other travelers). Our plane pushed off the gate early but we quickly discovered that it would be a long wait for clearance to take-off for Philadelphia. Three hours later we were back at the gate dealing with the aftermath of a cancelled flight. My customer service story was the only bright spot in this otherwise forgettable day.

It began when one of the male flight attendants spotted my Penn State cap and shirt. He flashed his Ohio State ring in my face and began to harass me (in a friendly way of course) about the recent football successes that his team has held over the Nittany Lions. Of course I defended my team’s efforts and reminded him about his own team’s failure to win a national championship.

A few minutes later I was startled to hear the Penn State fight song playing in my ear. The attendant was back, his cell phone playing a ringtone version of this famous sports anthem. As he explained how the song came to be on his phone, he proudly played the Ohio State fight song as well. The friendly batter about our football loyalties continued each time he made his way up and down the aisle.

I finally protested that all this Ohio State football chatter deserved a reward, like free water. He grinned and made his way to the front of the plane. A few minutes later he was back concealing a bottle that he stuffed under my arm. Needless to say, in spite of the flight delay, I had fun watching how he interacted with other passengers and the crew. With each new announcement from the cockpit that our take-off was delayed the cabin groaned with disappointment. Remaining upbeat, he and the crew handed out free beverages and snacks and did their best to make everyone comfortable.

In the end, I needed to spend an extra night in Pittsburgh. As I traveled home the next morning I thought about my experience with this special airline employee. His enthusiasm and attention to finding common ground with the passengers he served is an example of customer service at its best. While the disappointments of flight delays and cancellations made for a long day I was blessed to be served by someone who did his best to brighten my world, even if he is an Ohio State fan.

More about Root Canals

A few weeks ago I posted an entry about a trip to the dentist for my first root canal and detailed some of the leadership lessons I observed during my visit. The circle wouldn’t be complete without the final chapter in this tooth repair saga so here is a brief update and another important principal to becoming an effective leader.

The molar that required my initial surgery had recently been crowned, an expensive procedure involving a couple of visits to the dentist. Naturally I was dismayed when I learned that the newly placed crown would be drilled through during the root canal procedure. The dentist assured me that repairs to the crown would restore it completely and so last week I returned to the office for the final steps in this process.

I admit to a pretty high threshold for pain but dislike the dentist drill, even when my jaw is numb and my tongue feels like leather. The dentist announced that the temporary filling would be removed without the usual Novocain and then must have caught a look at my face. Yes, my mind was telling me, there is no live root in this tooth so it won’t hurt but I couldn’t help wondering if this wasn’t too good to be true. He was quick to reassure me that, while there would be the usual noise and water spatter, the procedure would be painless. I would need to trust him.

Trust is a funny thing because it can mean different things to different people. I generally view trust through my own experience with others and their behavior towards me. If they have been consistent in their actions and words then I can “trust” them to respond in the same way if a similar circumstance arises. My dentist would probably fit this definition of trust since I have known him and his colleagues for some time now and have observed this predictable behavior.

However, my position in the dentist chair was unlike any other occasion I had experienced and the advice he was offering couldn’t be validated by any of my previous trips to their office. I was at a distinct disadvantage. How was I to trust him? Would there really be no pain? That is where my definition of trust needed to take a different turn. Leaders must be vulnerable at times – admitting weaknesses, asking for help, and revealing fears. If I was to have a “pain-free” experience in the dentist chair it would require this type of trust. And so I settled back and allowed the persons who knew my misgivings to do their jobs.

The results were just as he had promised; grinding noises, water spraying, and NO PAIN. I’m glad I had the courage to trust my dentist and can only hope that someday he will experience the same level of trust when I am the one holding the drill. Just kidding!

Transitions - Part Two

Last week’s entry was devoted to the theme of transitions but it only contained part of the story. While the organizational changes I wrote about are real and very challenging, leaders also face many personal transitions – life passages that may be more difficult to navigate than any found in a workplace. A dear friend has been teaching me many valuable lessons about the future stages of life I am likely to face and I wish to share a few of them.

My friend is nearly 35 years older than me and I have been paying him a weekly visit for more than ten years. When we first began these hour-long connections he was already living in a retirement community apartment with his wife. She had recently been diagnosed with the early stages of dementia and the news had hit him hard, including a trip to the hospital. Our conversations took place over a light lunch that he prepared and I soon found myself immersed in the emotional, physical, and spiritual toll that illness brings. As her disease progressed my friend faced giving up his apartment for a smaller personal care room that he shared with her. Eventually her health required fulltime care in the facility’s Alzheimer wing and he moved to a private personal care room. While his health began to suffer, he was still able to care for himself. When she passed away his vigor continued to abate and after a recent hospital stay the decision was made to move him to a skilled care facility where he remains.

My brief summary of his story can never capture the pain, disappointment, anger, and fear that these life transitions force on us. How is one to cope when everything that is important to you, including the love of your life, is slowly slipping away? Are there any lessons to be learned that might prepare or comfort others who will face similar challenges? I have two observations that may offer clues about what is needed when personal changes are thrust upon us.

The first is faith. Life’s difficulties seldom come with instruction manuals or easy solutions. While faith is an unseen power, it can be a source of strength when facing the unknowns of illness, job loss, or divorce. Faith requires trusting in something bigger than you, a higher power that can deliver peace through stormy weather, protection when troubles surround you, and perseverance when facing hardship. My friend has been sustained by a strong, unshakable belief in a God who cares about him. He has experienced that care though his family, church, and friends. Without faith his story would likely be very different.

The second observation I would offer is the willingness to be content. Most of us have more than enough to live comfortably, yet the messages bombarding our consciousness every day suggest we need even more. As we age it becomes apparent that the stuff we have accumulated does little to assuage the pain and disappointment of failing health or the death of a loved one. When we learn to be content with our surroundings, embrace the small miracles and beauty of each day, eschew worry for an attitude of contentment, then we are better able to cope with life’s changes.

I’m sure my ideas don’t offer any profound new wisdom, in fact you may think they are simplistic and naïve. Yet, this is what I have witnessed as my friend and I have journeyed together through the many changes he has encountered. I’ve been privileged to share his joys and sorrows, to sense the depth of his faith and the balm of his contentment. Someday I hope others will write how these lessons came alive when I faced transitions in my life.