Memories

Nearly every week I spend an hour with a dear friend named Sam, a member of my church and someone who has become an important mentor since our visits began nearly ten years ago. As time has passed, and Sam has aged, his memories have faded as I expect mine will someday. Nonetheless we enjoy our conversations and frequently laugh at our inability to recall names, meals, or experiences from our past.

Sam’s wife, Alma, died four years ago after a struggle with Alzheimer’s disease, a frightening memory killer. He knows the pain of losing a loved one before they are really gone for good. His own memories of childhood events and the hymns of his faith remain strong and are a constant source of encouragement to him. We enjoy reminiscing about those times and that is why I wanted to offer these brief thoughts about memories.

During this time of year we all tend to get caught up in the bustle of the season – shopping, baking, decorating, and traveling. For some, the memories of past holidays are filled with joy and wonder while for others the season paints a darker portrait of pain and disappointment. Memory makes these times real in our mind’s eye.

Sam and I both recall childhood Christmas’ where the gifts were simple like an orange, some candy, or one special toy. There was plenty of love to go around and that made the need for lots of presents less important. Today we spoil our loved ones with plenty of gifts (in the name of love) and then go back to our workaholic lives to pay the bills we accumulated to buy them. Perhaps our children’s memories would be better served if we offered a simpler celebration and committed more of our time with them throughout the year. Not carting them off to this event or that practice, but really spending quality time with them.

The memories Sam has of family, work, and church are not all wonderful; there is pain found in every life and circumstance. Those moments of loss and grief can also serve us well. Without the ache of disappointment, death, and failure we would all be different persons. Our ability to tackle life’s toughest challenges and endure them would be lost without those painful memories.

On the eve of another Christmas celebration I hope you will enter this season with plenty of wonderful memories to sustain you. Perhaps you will create some new ones to treasure in future years. But if this time of year brings with it the sting of a recent job loss, unexpected illness, or death of a loved one may your memories serve a different purpose, to give you hope and promise. Blessings to all my loyal readers!